This is my method for that big, once-every-five-years closet clean-out, not the small ones you do every now and then just to keep things in order. Think of it as a detox for your wardrobe, which will leave it in excellent health and appearance when you are finished.

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This process will probably take a whole day (or maybe even two, depending on how many clothes you have), but it can be quite fun if you do it right. A suitable soundtrack, proper lighting, and some ready-made snacks and drinks (I suggest sparkling water mixed with apple juice) can do wonders, but your most indispensable aid will be a friend. Preferably a girl, preferably someone who knows you (and your style) well, and someone who can tell you her complete, honest opinion when it’s needed. I could never have done my clean-out without Boo (thank you, darling!).

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If your hair or face doesn’t look its best, do some simple things to improve this. Trust me – otherwise you’ll only end up focusing on said hair or face, and no clothes will look good. Just make sure you’re still able to try on a lot of clothes without fuss (which means no red lipstick or complicated updo, for instance). Some blusher, mascara and a slightly teased low ponytail (placed off-center) did the trick for me.

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Make sure your working space is tidy and has as many clear spaces as possible; one for laying out everything when removing it from the closet (I find my bed a good place, as it’s long enough to accommodate even floor-length dresses) and one for placing piles of clothes as you progress. You’ll also need a floor length mirror (or, in a crisis, a friend with a digital camera).

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Every dress, top, skirt and skeleton must now be transferred from the closet to the working area. And yes, I do mean all of it. If you keep your knickers in a drawer, you can leave them there (for the moment); the point is to empty the closet so nothing can hide and come out to scare you later. If you tend to stop mid-project, such as myself or Lorelai, I suggest removing the “fun” clothes first (in my case this would be dresses), and pile the more boring ones on top. This will give you motivation to keep going if courage should fail you later on. Lay everything flat on your designated area (this is where I use my bed, see?) on top of each other. Try to put them in layers so that all tops are together, all pants underneath, then all skirts, etc. This makes it easier to decide if you really should keep those jeans or not, since you can compare it to the rest of your jeans.

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Quickly wipe all surfaces of closet, and vacuum the floor if there be one. A clean slate is important, yes?

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Now begins the real job. Simply start on top of your pile and work your way down, trying on everything as you go along. As you put them on (and you do need to put them on, not just hold them up in front of you), ask yourself this:

♥ Does it fit me? If no, put aside.

♥ Does it look old and worn (look for stains, holes, faded colour, etc.). If yes, put aside.

♥ Have I worn this in the past two months (very seasonal items can be allowed a longer time period)? If no, put aside.

♥ Do I have many items that have the same function/look? If yes, you’ll have to decide on how many items in each category (jeans, t-shirts, dresses, etc.) you’ll allow yourself to keep, then decide between them.

How strict you must be with yourself depends on many things, like how many clothes you have to begin with, how much closet space you have available and how long it has been since your last thorough clean-up.

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The ones that survived this process you can safely keep. Fold them together by category, or hang up straight away to minimize wrinkling.

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The ones you’ve put aside must now be sorted in three (or four) piles. Pile One is for things that can be mended or altered and will then be ready for use. Keep Pile One as small as possible. Pile Two is things that are beyond help, and must simply be thrown away. Pile Three is for things to be donated or given away to friends/relatives. I’ll usually let my mother and sisters have the first pick, then ask a friend or two if they want anything, then deliver the rest to the Salvation Army. This year, though, I also made a Pile Four, which will contain things to be put in my as-of-now-nameless blog boutique… But more on that later, darlings!

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Put your underthings, stockings, tights and socks through the same process, getting rid of anything that doesn’t fit or doesn’t look good. If you really want to get a fresh start, you can also do the same with outerwear, bags and accessories.

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Fold everything that’s to be folded, place in neat piles in closet. Hang everything that might wrinkle. If you feel like really going crazy, you can sort the clothes by colour (the piles) and length (the hanging things). Cutting out some of your favourite editorials and hanging up on the inside of the closet door can be really helpful if you later feel uninspired.

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Congratulations, your closet is now in perfect condition… but you’re probably not. All that dressing and un-dressing has probably made you a sweaty mess, so reward yourself with the longest, steamiest shower imaginable, enjoying the knowledge that dressing afterwards will be easy as pie. At this point I suggest you sit down to paint your toenails – maybe with rollers in your hair to dry? – and write a list of the items you’ve discovered you ought to buy – and now also have room for.